Dictionary of PC terms - DJ Forums - DJ Passion

Karlos · #1 4th September 2006, 12:51

486 - The average IQ needed to understand a PC.

State-of-the-art - Any computer you can't afford.

Obsolete - Any computer you own.

Microsecond - The time it takes for your state-of-the-art
computer to become obsolete.

G3 - Apple's new Macs that make you say "Gee, three times
faster than the computer I bought for the same price a
Microsecond ago."

Syntax Error - Walking into a computer store and saying "Hi,
I want to buy a computer and money is no object."

Hard Drive - The sales technique employed by computer
salesmen, especially after a Syntax Error.

GUI - What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee
on it.

Keyboard - The standard way to generate computer errors.

Mouse - An advanced input device to make computer errors
easier to generate.

Floppy - The state of your wallet after purchasing a
computer.

Portable Computer- A device invented to force businessmen
to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips.

Disk Crash - A typical computer response to any critical deadline.

Power User - Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.

System Update - A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.

deader88 · #2 4th September 2006, 13:59

that's fun! i guess now i'm gonna

deader88 · #3 4th September 2006, 14:13

I did managed to find something fun

Enjoy!

... Air conditioned environment -- Do not open Windows.
... An elephant is the Windows version of an armadillo.
... Bugs come in thru Windows.
... Double your hard drive space instantly! Delete Windows!
... Friends don't let friends use Windows.
... If speed scares you - try Microsoft Windows.
... If Windows sucked it would at least be good for *something*.
... New from McAfee: WinScan. Deletes all Windows applications.
... No son, we use Windows to slow down games on 486's
... The best way to accelerate Windows is at 9.8m/s?
... The best way to accelerate Windows is into a wall.
... The best way to accelerate Windows is through one.
... Virus "Windows" found: (D)elete, (R)epair, (N)ext?
... We don't do Windows and we don't take American Express.
... Who needs rocks? Windows breaks itself.
... Windows = Headache + Trouble + Crashes - Money - Speed!
... Windows Benchmark: UAEs per second!
... Windows found: DEL *.* and RD (Y/y/y)?
... Windows gives me the panes.
... Windows is a pane in the ASCII!
... Windows isn't a virus. A virus does something.
... Windows, the world's first commercially succesful virus!
... Windows/NT: From the people who brought your EDLIN!
... Windows/NT: Windows/Neat in Theory?
... Windows/NT: Windows/Netherworld Trash?
... Windows/NT: Windows/Neurotic Theivery?
... Windows/NT: Windows/Never Tested?
... Windows/NT: Windows/Newest Throw-away?
... Windows: A View to be Killed.
... Windows: Nothing but an expensive, poorly written game of Solitaire!
... Windows: The 80486 to PC conversion kit.
... Windows: The Gates of Hell.
... Windows: Veni, vidi, shelfi.
... Windows? Honey, don't play that!
... WinError #01: Unable to figure out own code. System crashed.
... WinError #16: Window locked. Try Ctrl-Alt-Del. Then RESET.
... Winers never quit and never use Windows.
... Ya know what I like about Windows? Not one damn thing.
... Windows, Icons, Mouse, Pointer: WIMP
... Girlfriend pregnant error... [A]bort, [M]arry, [i]gnore?