yeh because the front of house speakers are usually facing away from you and cause sometimes there is a tiny timelag it always sounds different from what is in the headphones - hence the use of monitors
how do your friends mix??
if they mix completely in their headphones then there me be some perception of tempo change
i mix with one ear listening to the cue in one ear and one ear listening to the main output from a speaker - maybe cause i listen to the speaker and the headphone at the same time i never percieve a tempo change
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